Monday, April 30, 2007

In a Circle of Clergy

I had the experience today of sitting with a group of clergy-- all fairly new to the whole minister business-- and participating in a conversation about "Who am I turning out to be as a pastor?" It was so fascinating hearing people talk about the complications of the pastoral role, about the expectations we have versus the reality that hits us, about the expectations they have (the congregation, that is) versus the reality, and what it is to be mutually disappointed and yet recognize the grace therein.

I know of no one else in this group who is gay or lesbian (for certain, that is). But, of course, I have my suspicions. There is one woman with whom I find I am constantly exchanging glances-- we "check in" with one another as the group is talking, we notice one another's reactions. We smile at one another.

We are both waiting to see if it is safe.

2 comments:

more cows than people said...

hope it is, safe, i mean.

sounds like the week is turning out as you hoped. i'm glad to hear that.

love you.

janinsanfran said...

After you come out -- that will happen eventually -- you are going to have a good time comparing notes on the past with some people. I never got a "better late than never" reaction from lesbians who knew me when. Folks were most gracious.

My rector actually preached an Easter sermon that spoke to this.

Hang in there and you'll do whatever you do in your own good time and God's good time.