I have been standing over my sink, pulling shriveled leaves from the red and pink tulips that my Beloved sent to me on Valentine's Day, along with the same message she always sends: I love you so. I have been trying to steal another day, another half day for these gifts which are by nature ephemeral.
They arrived last Thursday while I was at work, and I didn't find them until I'd returned from our date, late at night. My daughter had put them on the piano, still enshrouded with plastic. They were not arranged, but strewn in a red glass vase, a rectangle that flared outward from its base. They were breathtaking. Now, even stripped of their greenery, their earlier glory, they still are.
Beloved called me this afternoon. She'd found a quote that she just had to read me. It was from Julia Child.
I think it's a shame to be caught up in something that doesn't make you tremble with joy.
It reminded me of you, she said. Which is funny, because it reminds me of her. It reminds me of both of us... how we feel about our work, how we feel about our children, how we feel about one another.
Sometimes I want to weep with gratitude for all of it, the wonder of it.
5 comments:
ah, Cecelia, gratitude, wonder, joy. Partner and I are still caught up in it, but issues have arisen. So we've agreed to joint therapy - I think of it more like mediation to make sure that each of us hears and understands the other. Being out of the closet is no guarantee that life flows smoothly. And, I got a bagful of old buttons for Valentine's Day - she got a new kite! May you find that time to be together!
I am so glad to have discovered your blog.... my partner sent me the link. There is joy in my heart just knowing you are there. Thank you.
:-)
I did a funeral this past Friday of a person who, although 80 years old, died suddenly and unexpectedly.
At the funeral, a grandchild mentioned how the deceased often said: 'Aren't we lucky!'
I've been hearing the person's voice saying that phrase a lot and I heard it again just now.
God bless you both and may you continue to see yourselves as lucky and blessed.
SO LOVELY! Bless your hearts!
I think it's a shame to be caught up in something that doesn't make you tremble with joy.
Yes! Oh, yes. Julia was a wonder in so, so many ways.
*hugs you lots* I'm so happy for you and your Beloved.
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